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Licensed Contractor Human Hoodie

Licensed Contractor Human Hoodie

$64.99

Human Hoodie Size Chart

Measurements are in inches. This hoodie has a boxy, oversized fit with a drop shoulder — order your usual size, or size down for a trimmer look.

Description XS S M L XL 2XL 3XL
Body Length from HPS 26.5 27.5 28.5 29.5 30.5 32 33
Chest Width 1" Below Armhole 22 23.25 24.5 25.5 26.75 28 29
Sleeve Length from Center Back inc Cuff Rib 35 36 37 38 39 40 41

Tip: Measure your favorite hoodie flat and compare for the best fit.

📏 Fit Tips

  • Boxy, oversized fit: already roomy with a drop shoulder — no need to size up.
  • For your usual fit: order your normal hoodie size.
  • Want it trimmer? Size down one.
  • Best check: lay a hoodie you already love flat and measure armpit to armpit, then compare to the Chest Width.
  • Between sizes? The roomy cut means the smaller size still wears comfortably.
  • Made to order: allow about an inch (3cm) of natural variation.
Color
Size

Fit: Oversized, boxy — runs large. Want it trimmer? Size down one.

Licensed Contractor & Site Foreman Pet and Owner Hoodie Set Want the matching pet hoodie? See the full set — both hoodies, full photos, pet sizing and fit details. View the set — $89.99

Hoodie Details

Oversized boxy fit with dropped shoulders — room to actually move in a kitchen · Midweight 80/20 cotton-poly fleece, around 8.5 oz · No drawcord — nothing to drag through the pan or the sink · Ribbed cuffs and hem hold their shape when you push the sleeves up · Front DTG print that softens with the hoodie instead of cracking

Shipping & Delivery

Production takes 3–5 business days.

You'll receive a tracking number as soon as your hoodie ships.

  • 🇺🇸 US: 3–5 business days
  • 🇨🇦 Canada: 5–8 business days

Business days exclude weekends and holidays.

Frequently Asked Questions

How do I wash it?
Cold wash inside out, tumble dry low, no fabric softener on the print.

Fit Promise: made to order to our size charts. Misprinted or more than an inch off the size you ordered? Let us know within 7 days and we'll remake it for free. Size & Fit Guide →

🐾 Pet-parent approved
💌 Made with cozy comfort
🎁 Perfect for gifting
🔒 Secure checkout

Nobody licensed you. You just became the person who fixes everything — the leak, the shelf, the thing the landlord won't, the mystery noise at 2am. This is the badge for a job you were never officially given and somehow can't quit.

Licensed Contractor. Certified by nobody, trusted by everybody, on call 24/7 whether you like it or not.

You don't have a license. You have a toolbox that started with three things and now needs its own shelf, a mental list of everything in the house that's one bad day from breaking, and a household that treats "I'll take a look at it" as a binding legal contract.

Congratulations. You're the contractor now. This is your badge.

Built for the job, whatever the job turns out to be

The Licensed Contractor badge is printed direct-to-garment on the front, so it's part of the fabric rather than sitting on top of it. It softens as the hoodie softens instead of cracking off the first hard winter.

  • Oversized boxy fit with dropped shoulders — real room to reach, crouch and work
  • Midweight 80/20 cotton-poly fleece, around 8.5 oz — warm without the bulk
  • No drawcord — nothing to snag on a nail, a drawer or a drill
  • Ribbed cuffs and hem hold their shape when you shove the sleeves up
  • Front DTG badge print that softens with the fabric instead of cracking
  • A complete joke on its own — no second piece required
  • Easy to gift: hoodie size is the only thing you need to know
  • Matching pet hoodie available separately when you want the apprentice in on it

    • A gift for the person who fixes everything

    If you're buying for the household handyman — the one who never gets thanked and never stops getting asked — this is the rare funny gift that gets worn on purpose. You need their hoodie size and nothing else.

Made to order, not mass-made. Printed just for you. And when a design retires, it's gone for good.

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